Mile Side Club
After a hard days work, sometimes you just need to lounge in whatever place is most available. One of her co-workers might want to let her into the ‘secret’ of comfy first class seats. It’s a good thing airline employees are tested for drugs and alcohol, or we wouldn’t have enough overhead bin space for bags. We are impressed with how she maneuvered her way into the bin. With a quick nap in her system, she will be ready to work in no time.
Some people have no shame. This guy was not going for a quick glance at the flight attendant, but wanted his money’s worth and stayed for the whole show. Flight attendants in the old days used to dress more scantily than they do today. It still does not excuse this guy from flagrantly looking at her behind. She is just trying to do her job and serve the man in the row behind our star perv a beverage.
Fight Or Flight
A fight in any scenario is going to attract attention. On a flight, it will only cause more commotion. With little space and little care, these girls went at it mid-flight. Plenty of passengers took their phones out to capture the moment, hoping someone gets knocked out and their video can go viral. We need to know if this flight has popcorn in the food cart. The rest of the passengers deserve some munch for this highly anticipated bout.
Flying Solo… Literally
What would you do if you had an entire plane to yourself? This guy has to be the luckiest passenger in the history of commercial air travel. It is one thing to have a row to yourself, but an entire cabin is just unheard of. He is a smart guy too taking advantage of a flight’s worth of food and stocking up on whatever Delta had to offer. We can only hope that his flight was long enough for him to enjoy the ride.
Farm To Table
Pet therapy is a real thing, but, come on, is a turkey really the best option? Does the turkey have its seatbelt on like everyone else? It is astonishing that the airline allowed this passenger to bring this ground-bound bird into the air. We can only hope that he is bringing his bird home to prepare for a Thanksgiving feast. In the case of an emergency landing, we know which passenger will be the first to be devoured.
Do You Smell Something?
To be fair, a pig is a more reasonable therapy pet than a turkey. Still, why do these people have an aversion to the classic dog or cat? Why bring barn animals into the equation? Further, why bring them on a plane? Porky here is having the time of his life. While he enjoys his complimentary beverage and a good book, the passengers around him are greeted by his unpleasant barnyard musk and occasional squeals.
All we can do is pray that this passenger did not pay for an extra seat for her ‘pet’ stuffed hamburger. If it gives her comfort, who are we to judge, but it seems like an unnecessary cost. The hamburger would not be offended if it spent the flight in the overhead compartment, because, well, plush toys don’t have feelings or emotions. She is probably just reserving the seat for when her child returned and wanted to take extra care in case of turbulence.
That Dang Duck
Take a look at this photo. Do you see the two most peculiar elements of this picture? For one, the duck is wearing a leash like a dog going for a walk or a child learning to ski for the first time. Most importantly, the duck is wearing socks! Sock game has become an integral part of today’s style. Who knew that the fowl community was also in on the trend? This duck is getting the VIP treatment between its cozy webbed toes and a neck rub.
Everyone make way, we have a celebrity on board. Bullseye, the dog from the Target commercials, is so humble that he is sitting in coach like an ordinary dog. How nice of him to grace the commoners with his adorable presence. The alternative is that this manipulative dog owner painted the bullseye on his dog to receive star treatment. Are their Bullseye the Target Dog impersonators roaming the globe? We can only hope that they are cute as this one.
Tired of human life and looking to become an ostrich? Look no further than the OstrichPillow, a sleek fashion statement which makes you look more alien than an ostrich. At $100 a pop, who can resist some ostrich cosplay? We can side-eye this guy’s choice of travel pillow all day, but it is apparently one of the most comfortable travel pillows on the market, justifying its steep price. It not only acts as a pillow but also blocks noise and light as you rest comfortably through the flight.
We might not be flying experts, but common sense says that you need to be awake actually to fly a plane. Flying on auto-pilot is routine during long flights, but we like the comfort of knowing that someone is actually piloting the plane. According to a survey of pilots, half of the pilots sleep at some point during a flight. More alarmingly, a third of pilots wake up to see their co-pilot asleep. We better hope they set plenty of alarm clocks.
Unlike a duck or a turkey, a kangaroo needs at least one seat to itself. We would not want it hopping around during the flight, but getting a seatbelt on might be a difficult endeavor. Worst of all, imagine being in the seat in front of a kangaroo. Thought you hated when someone kicked your seat before, how does it feel to get the full impact of a kangaroo’s kick? At least its owner will have a body pillow of sorts to lean on mid-flight.
Buckle Up Butter-Cup!
Having a drink in the terminal is a ritual event when flying for some. This guy took it a bit too far and found himself sloshed before boarding his flight. Belligerence in any circumstance is a faux pas but has no place in the tight quarters of a flight. Let this be a lesson to those attempting to drink themselves through a flight: flight attendants won’t hesitate to duct tape you to your seat and zip tie your legs together.
Ah, the joys of fatherhood. This guy deserves an award for tolerating such an uncomfortable position for any duration on this flight. It is already difficult enough to get comfy on a flight without the ‘joys’ of an upper deck rider. At least his boy is happy to take in the view. Who knows what kind of airplane shenanigans he is witnessing from up there. He probably spotted the beverage cart and is trying flag down an extra apple juice.
Smile, You’re On Candid Camera
This guy has taken sit back and relax to a new level. You might feel like a king when you have a row to yourself, but it does not come with permission to start undressing. Someone needs to wake this guy up and tell him to zip his pants back up. Undoing your pants might be an easy way to cozy up, but is rude to those around you. Also, please move your feet so the snack cart can pass.
BFF = Best Finger Friends
Don’t you wish you could be best friends with this cute baby too? What a nice treat it must have been for this passenger to find a teething friend that never wants to say goodbye. If sharing your finger with a baby for a flight will keep him or her from screaming the whole ride, then you do what it takes. The only thing that could have disrupted this budding friendship is if the child tried mistook the finger for a pacifier.
As a child, you are taught never to put a plastic bag over your head. Hopefully, there were no kids around this passenger to receive mixed messaging. There are only so many logical arguments to be made for why a full body bag is necessary on a plane. Is it an effort in self-quarantining, staying away from the airborne germs circulating through the cabin? Did they run out of blankets? We hope he has a hole for ventilation or else the airline will have bigger problems.
Bravo to the photographer responsible for this photo. The use of toy dinosaurs to create the illusion that they are peering out the window is beyond creative. Somebody call Steven Spielberg and Michael Crichton – it’s is time to move Jurassic Park from an island to the sky. The colors below give off the appearance of the dinosaurs returning home after a long journey above the clouds. If they look long enough, maybe they will see a pterodactyl soaring adjacent to the plane.
Furbys Forbidden In Flight
For some time, airlines seemed to overestimate the effects of electronic devices. Even today you hear about how cell phones do not truly cause any disturbances in the air. Back then, battery powered devices were considered as significant of a risk. You can tell this warning is from the 1990s. The hamster-like Furby and digital pet Tamagotchi have not been popular in almost two decades, no one brings antenna radios on planes (or owns them), and cell phones have moved away from key pads.
Kids Just Wanna Have Fun
Clearly, this is not a JetBlue flight. Without any personal televisions to flip through, this passenger was treated to a different form of entertainment – a puppet show. He or she sat directly behind a kid who was interested in making his own fun on this flight. An impromptu telling of Finding Nemo could be a hilarious way to spend your time instead of flipping through Sky Mall for the tenth time. Even without dialogue, the show would be welcomed.
Don’t forget to bring your pocket guitar on your next flight. You need to be ready for a jam in every situation like this guy. Just lay him a smooth bass line, and he will snap out of his nap and into the groove. Fortunately for other passengers, this guy considerately brought headphones to plug into his keyboard. Some riders might appreciate his Elton John routine, but others just want to catch some Z’s and make it to their destination.
Planes can be a dirty place, filled with disease and airborne viruses. This guy was taking no risks on his flight. Fortunately for us, we can laugh at his caution. The combination of doctor’s mask with the eye shade, neck pillow, and stereo headphones makes him look like a poorly drawn Marvel comic book super villain. He might want to look into the ostrich pillow so he can have all of these luxuries in one convenient package.
Stench From Above
Trying to figure out where that horrible smell of feet is coming from? Look no further than this inconsiderate jerk, hanging his socks for everyone to smell. Whoever gave this guy the idea to dry his socks on the window of a plane is severely misguided. How can the passengers in his row or behind him not tell him how dumb this is? It takes a lot of gall to pull a smelly stunt like this in a full airplane.
My Little Plane Pony
We are back with yet another therapy animal unsuitable for a plane. This poor pony gets scrunched between the wall and this couple. Well, we hope that is a couple. The woman does not look so pleased to have a pony encroaching on her leg space. It would be cruel to keep this pony stuck in such a position. Hopefully, they took the pony for a walk down the aisles at some point to stretch its legs.
The Softer Side Of Flying
The juxtaposition of a biker gang looking fella sleeping on a businessman’s shoulder is too perfect. The businessman looks so uncomfortable but incapable of bringing himself to wake the guy up. Everyone needs a shoulder to snuggle up against on a long flight. It looks like the businessman probably will not be getting much done on his laptop this flight. If the flight attendant comes around anytime soon, he might need a drink or six.
Reserved For Cello
Saturday Night Live might want to adapt this scenario into one of its sketches. This woman had no interest in checking her valuable cello, so she bought a ticket for it. It should have guaranteed a place for the instrument, but the airline crew did not seem to think so. They are always asking you to stow your belongings appropriately. So what happens when you purchased a seat for it? You get asked numerous times to remove it only to show it’s a ticketed ‘passenger.’
Eyes In The Back Of Your Head
Parents and teachers will always warn children that they are watching their every move because they have eyes in the back of their heads. This guy took it literally and tattooed eyes on his skull. He might consider wearing a cap not to scare passengers on the plane. The eyes are not the biggest problem, but the menacing shape of the eyebrows. If he wears his sunglasses like chef Guy Fieri, he can keep the sun out of his other eyes.
The Party Plane
The old days of air travel looked like a blast compared to the bummer it is today. Look at these happy people sharing a drink and a laugh. It looks more like they are enjoying a conversation at a bar than on a plane. It makes us crave a time when air travel could be fun. Planes might be safer today than in the past, but people would surely sacrifice to improve the current state of airborne angst and unfriendly travel.
In essence, a plane is a large metal tube that hovers above the ground at super speeds. The slightest mishap can turn a routine flight into an emergency. In the case of emergency on this flight, you might be out of luck searching for your life vest. It won’t be until you’ve hit the water that you’ll find a flotation device. It would be a good idea to replace this label to remove any confusion this could cause.
Actor Nick Offerman did not seem the least bit pleased to be caught on camera on this flight. Known for his role as the grizzly Ron Swanson on Parks and Recreation, Offerman looks ready to take this passenger’s phone and toss it out the window. Like any other flyer, Offerman just wants to get through with it and get on the ground. Let’s be honest, who would not want to document a chance encounter with Ron F-ing Swanson?
Hurley From Lost
Lost fans will definitely get a kick out of this photo. If there was one person from the show that you would not want on your flight, Hurley Reyes is the guy. The unlucky, yet lovable Hurley was found next to this man on a plane to LAX. Of course, the show begins with a plane crash on a flight from Sydney to LAX. This is just one of those moments you need to tell yourself that the show is not real.
Puff The Magic Dragon
Did you ever wonder why the armrest on your seat has an ashtray, or why the bathroom has a no smoking sign on top of an ashtray? Smoking used to be not only allowed on flights but very prevalent. Before public pressure stigmatized smoking, it was quite common in every public place. In the 60s and 70s, you could like a cigarette on your flight like this trio of 70s style superstars. Hopefully, they enjoyed it before it became illegal.
What a treat it would be to sit next to funnyman Stephen Colbert. The host of the Late Show would be the perfect person to get you through a dull flight. His goofy smile is entertainment enough and could keep us laughing all day long. Maybe he will snap a selfie with you, so your friends believe that it actually happened. With enough persistence, you might be able to convince him to call his buddy Jon Stewart to join in on the fun.
Who Wears Short Shorts?
Before a politically correct culture took over the public consciousness, flight attendants were part of the show on an airplane. Good looking women in uniform were part of the messaging of different airlines to bring in customers – and it worked. Today, flight attendants dress more professionally, tossing aside the short shorts for pants or long skirts with stockings. They do, however, still wear an ascot, which has been a mainstay in the flight attendant uniform for decades.
Baby On Board
Sometimes, you just don’t know when life is going to hit you. For this baby, life began while on board an international flight. While the mother recovers, these flight attendants are taking turns holding and caring for the new born. They tell you not to fly after seven months pregnant, but if you don’t mind giving birth in the air then do what you must. Was there a doctor on board for this birth or did the stewardesses take control of the situation?
The woman sprawled out on her chair asleep is clearly the winner in this photo. However, do not sleep on the creeper in the row behind her. With her eyes peering over the top of the seat, she is keeping a close watch on anyone who approaches. Perhaps the sleeping woman asked her to keep a watch. Even with those piercing eyes in the background, it’s impossible to keep your own eyes off of the sleeper. She is bound to wake up with an aching back.
A Typical Friday Flight
This is the couple that we want to sit next to. They decided to bring the party right on the plane and did not care who knew it. They shamelessly went about their business with a baby in the row in front of them. High altitude affects alcohol consumption, so it is no surprise that they are both passed out. Next time they should bring enough for the entire cabin to share.
Kobe’s New Gig
Since he has retired from professional basketball, Kobe Bryant looks to be taking his other talents to the sky. Who knew that the five time NBA champion was a master card stacker as well? Those skills might not have translated to the court, but the Black Mamba is attacking his project with exceptional precision. With so much time on his hands, he might want to consider card stacking as a profession in a city like Las Vegas.
Flight attendants work hard to provide a positive flying experience. On international flights, they deserve a break as much as anyone. Unfortunately, their seats are unbelievably upright and uncomfortable. This woman may have found the best cheat code to sleeping in them – just harness in and let gravity take over. We do not even want to imagine the marks she will have afterward, but if it means a few minutes of peace and relaxations, she has earned it.
In a strange twist of fate, these two bearded redheads happened to be sitting next to each other on a flight. They might look like twins, but in reality, they are complete strangers. Were they separated at birth? We need to know more about their family histories to understand how this could be possible. The guy behind them is almost as amused as they are. Get these guys a free shot to celebrate their long overdue family reunion.
Chewbacca Is In Da House
If ponies and turkeys are allowed on board, it is nice to see that the airline is open to Wookie passengers as well. Some might call him a therapy pet of sorts for Han Solo, but he is best known as his co-pilot on the Millenium Falcon. After making the Kessel Run in 12 parsecs, we can assume Chewy is pretty underwhelmed with the speed of air travel on earth. Put him in the cockpit and see what he can do.
What A Drag
Richard Branson is one of the best-known billionaires in the world. His Virgin empire spans across numerous industries, including his foray into flight, Virgin Airlines. Branson lost a bet to AirAsia’s CEO Tony Fernandes and had to dress up as a female flight attendant on a six hour AirAsia flight. Branson was a good sport about and was a welcomed surprise to unsuspecting passengers. He worked for the flight as if he was any other flight attendant.
Did you ever wonder how the Chinese buffet chain got its name? Look no further than the actual Panda Express, taking humans and pandas across the globe for only a small fee. All it needs is small bag of peanuts – err, bamboo – and this panda is ready to take to the skies. No need to be concerned for the passenger to his right; he seems content sitting next to this furry fella. In reality, this stuffed bear was a promo stunt on a Chinese airline.
And you thought penguins could not fly! These black and white bundles of arctic joy are having a ball roaming the aisle. The guy to the right is so pleasantly surprised that he went right for his phone to document the occasion. Planes tend to be reasonably chilly, but passengers might start to complain if they try to recreate an arctic atmosphere. They were just catching a flight in between filming the BBC and Discovery Channel series Frozen Planet.
Is That You, Jiminy Cricket?
Whether watching a movie or getting some work done, it’s impossible to take a flight without seeing someone with their laptop. Did you know this practice is nothing new and people have been bringing typing machines on planes for years? Without laptop technology available, Walt Disney had to settle for bringing his handy typewriter on a flight. Either Jiminy Cricket told a funny joke, or Disney realized that he just came up with Dumbo.